This is going to be a fun one!

I’ve been brainstorming this one in my head for a while, but don’t have any outline, so it may be all over the place. Just sit back, relax, and let the good times roll because this one is gonna be all over the place.

MBT = Mouth Breathing Troglodytes

Cannabis Has Medicinal and Therapeutic Properties PERIOD.

This is empirical fact and not up for debate anymore. 20 years ago, much of the data was anecdotal and studies were in vitro or from overseas, so opponents could still say, “There isn’t scientific proof.” While these same people routinely ignore science when it proves them wrong, they embrace it when it furthers their agendas. If hypocrisy were a drug, these people would legalize it and drink it like the alcohol that made their red cauliflower noses.

We now have every type of data that proves cannabis has a plethora of medical benefits – in vivo, in vitro, peer-reviewed studies from U.S. universities and drug companies, and 5000 years of anecdotal evidence. I highlighted that the studies have come from American institutions because the MBTs loved saying, “All your ‘proof’ comes from other countries. We can’t trust the inferior medical programs of third world counties.” Like all of their arguments, this has giant holes in it. The first hole is that the studies came out of Israel. I don’t think that even Walt Disney considered Israel a third world county (Walt Disney was famously anti-Semitic). Second, The U.S. Government’s schedule 1 drug classification of cannabis made it illegal to do any studies without the Government’s permission. The National Institute of Drug Abuse (NIDA) is the agency responsible for approving studies for schedule 1 drugs and they only would approve studies that attempted to show harm.

For instance, if your application to research cannabis had the hypothesis, “We think cannabinoids may shrink cancer tumors”, NIDA isn’t going to approve your study. However, if your hypothesis is, “We think marijuana causes lower IQs in teenagers”, they’re gonna respond with, “How much money do you need to try and prove this?”

Despite Undeniable Evidence, Who Still Believes that Cannabis Doesn’t Have Medical Uses?

Idiots, a-holes, or a combination of the 2 are the only possible explanations at this point. In fact, it has to be a combination because ALL a-holes have an idiot component to them. However, not all idiots are a-holes. A dummy who admits they don’t know what’s going on is self-aware and cool. The dangerous ones are the ones who are idiots that think they’re smarter than everyone else.

Let’s start with the idiots because they are much easier to understand.

Analytical thinking is difficult for less intelligent animals. Most people tend to avoid things that are difficult.

Here’s a real life example. I’m only 5’5″ and 140 lbs., which makes me a small man, especially by American standards. Consequently, I don’t like doing things that are geared for big or tall people because it’s hard and, oftentimes, painful. For instance, playing basketball with people that are a foot taller than you is very difficult and very frustrating, so I tend to avoid it. Also, getting things off the top shelves in my kitchen sucks because I have to get a chair to reach it. Consequently, the top shelves of my cabinets are either empty or have stuff that I rarely use in them.

I imagine that a dumb person trying to understand things is as difficult and frustrating as it is for a short person trying to dunk a basketball. You eventually realize that ‘this just isn’t gonna happen’, so you move on something that has a higher success rate.

I also think it’s safe assumption that idiots don’t do a lot of ‘pleasure learning.’ Most of them quit learning as soon as they get out of high school. Brains are like muscles where if you don’t use them, they get weaker. So, when you see someone in their 50s that’s an idiot, they haven’t used their brain for something productive since color TVs were new.

Expecting these MBTs to keep up with current science and medicine is a big ask, so I’ll leave them alone.

This brings us to a much more insidious person who doesn’t believe in cannabis’ medicinal value…The A-hole.

These people are far more dangerous than idiots because they have ulterior motives.

Medical cannabis deniers rely on red herring fallacies when defending their lies. Their misdirection includes ‘protecting the kids’, religion, ‘it’s untested’, and ‘it’s a gateway drug’. We’re going to deconstruct all of these one by one, but don’t be fooled. The real reason that people still are against cannabis is MONEY. We’ll come back to this later. Let’s blow some holes into some flimsy strawman arguments against cannabis first.

Red Herring #1: We shouldn’t recognize cannabis as medicine to protect our kids from drugs.

I get it. This sounds great to say because saying the opposite, “I don’t want to protect kids from drugs” sounds awful because it is. But no cannabis advocate wants to harm kids. Our society has gotten so dumb that dichotomy can’t exist. It’s like with Trump and Biden. If I say I don’t like Trump, many people respond with, “So, you like that criminal Biden?” “No.” I don’t like either of them. They are both old, crooked pieces of shit. Why can’t I dislike 2 things at the same time. It’s like if I said, “I hate rapists” and someone responds with, “So, you think pedophiles are good?” No. I think that all rapists and pedophiles should be thrown out in the middle of the ocean and turn into crab food. Then, they’ll have an opportunity to become something valuable – fertilizer.

I think most people are smart enough to walk and chew gum at the same time, so we can be honest about the benefits of cannabis while still acknowledging that abusing it is bad.

If we want to be very honest about how well these ‘drug warriors’ are protecting kids from drugs, let’s look at overdose deaths since they started the War on Drugs. I think the war on drugs has killed more Americans than  ALL of the real wars combined.

Fake fentanyl pills. Who created the opioid and fentanyl epidemic? Yep. Big Pharma and their FDA toadies. They are the ones who approved the OxyContin lies of Richard Sackler’s Purdue Pharma. They’re the ones who made BILLIONS while addicting 2 generations of Americans on drugs stronger than Heroin (also made by Big Pharm – Bayer actually).

Then, it became a ‘problem’ and they made it impossible to find benzos and Percocet, so who stepped in to fill the demand? Chinese fentanyl manufacturers and Mexican Cartel distributors. I’m 44. When I was in my 20s, finding a Valium and a Vicodin was easy. For $5, you could get 1 of each, fix your hangover, and get a good nights sleep. Now, buying those pills is like playing Russian Roulette – literally. What looks like a perfectly safe yellow 10mg Watson Hydrocodone can kill you.

If someone really wants to protect kids from drugs, we need to completely reevaluate our drug policy and the war on drugs. But, we’re not going to because of money. And don’t worry, I’m gonna address this.

Red Herring #2: My Religion says Cannabis is Against God’s Will.

This is nonsense. First, NO religion specifically calls out cannabis. There’s a lot religious text that calls out getting drunk, but I’m not going to muddy the water because I’m not a punk that hides behind misdirection to win a debate.

I’ve debated several self-proclaimed Christians who say cannabis is a sin. They can never provide any evidence and get mad when asked to show where The Bible says this. They may try the Genesis story of Adam and Eve and the ‘forbidden fruit’, but that doesn’t work because the only thing that would teach us is that we shouldn’t eat apples. Then, they try to say that apples where a metaphor for something else. This is closer to the truth, but I’d vote for the forbidden fruit to either be a deadly mushroom or the opium poppy before I throw cannabis in there.

Another fun fact is that the Bible lists the ingredients of Jesus’ Holy Anointing Oil. The oldest Bible texts list Kaneh Bosem as one of the ingredients. Wow. That sounds a lot like ‘cannabis’ because it means ‘cannabis’ in Hebrew. Don’t forget Jesus was a Jew, so all the old stuff is in Hebrew. Let’s think about some of Jesus’ miracles. He stopped people afflicted with uncontrollable quaking. That sounds like a seizure and science has proven cannabis is the best seizure medication. Jesus cured blindness. Back in the day, people bathed in rivers that had parasites that caused River Blindness. Cannabis and the other ingredients in the anointing oil will kill the larvae that cause River Blindness.

The point here is not to disprove Jesus’ power. It’s to prove that Jesus and His dad made the cannabis plant have all the power that it does. He was showing us how to use it. Unfortunately, a lot of people think they know more than God and Jesus and try push their hubris on the rest of us. Many of these people call themselves ‘Christians.’ I’m pretty the Bible says something about this being unchristian, but I’m no theologian.

The Bible also has a few parts about compassion, not judging people, and helping those in need, but I guess a-holes gloss over Jesus’ inconvenient teachings.

Red Herring #3: Cannabis is Untested.

I’m not gonna spend a lot of time here because we went over it earlier. It IS TESTED. A-holes may not like the results, but I don’t like how the Falcons blew that lead in The Super Bowl against the Patriots, but it still happened. When it wasn’t tested, it was because the U.S. Govt. didn’t allow testing. If the a-holes want cannabis tested for accuracy and safety, then they’re feeding my argument that it needs to be federally legalized and regulated so that all of us have to get our products tested. As a cannabis company, I want mandatory testing because it will weed out the scumbag competition who makes shitty products and sells them for nothing because it’s fake or dirty. I want a level playing field and accountability for my competition.

Red Herring #4: Cannabis is a Gateway Drug.

Like all the other a-hole arguments against medical cannabis, this is half true. I will concede that illegal marijuana can be a gateway drug because you have to go to a drug dealer to buy it. I’m going to let everyone in on a secret – drug dealers sell drugs.

So, if you have to go to a drug dealer to buy cannabis, you may have the opportunity to buy other drugs. It’s just like Publix putting gum, candy bars, and drinks at the check out. Their impulse items. Two drugs that are commonly used together are alcohol and cocaine.

Do you know how many times I bought a gram of coke while I was checking out at a liquor store?

Zero.

It may be hard to believe, but I never bought coke at a liquor store. You know why people don’t buy cocaine at liquor stores? Because they don’t sell it. I suspect that if Total Wine sold eight balls at the check out, 2 or 3 Friday and Saturday night shoppers just may buy one. Just a hunch.

The only reason that someone could accurately call cannabis a ‘gateway drug’ is because going to a drug dealer opens the accessibility of harder drugs. If you subscribe to this line of thought, “Thank you!”, because you’re strengthening my argument for legalizing and regulating cannabis.

A dumber definition of ‘gateway drug’ is the first drug someone does that leads them to search for a better high. If you’re using this definition, alcohol is the real gateway drug. Take that up with the U.S. Govt and the alcohol lobby, not me.

Since All the Excuses Against Supporting Medical Cannabis are Nonsense, Why is there Still a Debate?

M-O-N-E-Y

When you hear about the ‘Green Rush’ and the billions in profits that legal cannabis creates, it’s important to remember that matter can neither be created nor destroyed. Money is matter and businesses don’t ‘create’ it. They take it from other businesses.

When Google started making billions, they didn’t ‘make’ new money. For each dollar that Google made, another business lost a dollar. Who lost the money when Google ‘made’ $100B, go ask the print media and traditional advertisers (if you can find one). To sum this up, when someone makes $1 billion, someone else lost $1 billion. When you understand this, you understand why lobbyists exist. You also understand why most politicians are so dirty that you can get an e. coli infection from shaking their hand.

Now that we know that cannabis opponents are using red herring fallacies to protect their cash cow, let’s learn who these people are. You’ll guess some, but others will surprise you. We’ll start with the obvious and work our way to the more obscure (but still VERY POWERFUL).

Big Pharma

Every one knows this by now. If you look at states that have a safe, legal access to cannabis, the numbers show that prescription drug use is down by 20-25% in these states. Let’s be honest about the drug companies. They want to create new treatments for diseases, but they’re ultimate responsibility is to make money. That’s why they don’t ‘cure’ anything anymore. They make monthly treatments. This is the correct business model for each Board member to have a $70M private jet.

All the RX drugs that exist are based upon something found in nature. The problem is that you can’t defend a patent on a naturally occurring molecule. That’s why they take something natural and modify it – patent protection. Chris Rock made a joke about how the last thing they cured was polio and they’re still kicking themselves for not making it a monthly treatment.

Big Pharma knows that cannabis has medical value. They also believe there should be cannabis-based medications. However, their support is contingent that they get a monopoly and sole ownership of cannabinoid medicine. That’s why you’ll hear a familiar talking point from Big Pharma – “We know that cannabis has medicinal value. The consumer deserves safe, FDA-approved medicine that ONLY WE can make.”

Thanks, Big Pharma, but your credibility is shaky because of your track record with your other safe, FDA-approved drugs like Heroin, fentanyl, thalidomide, olanzapine, thorazine, Wellbutrin, Prozac, Pristiq, Paxil, and MORE! For a longer list, go to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_withdrawn_drugs

We appreciate yall trying to ‘improve’ cannabis, but we’ll just stick to how nature and God made it. You guys stick with what yall are good at…addicting people to drugs for vulgar profits.

Private Prison Corporations and Law Enforcement Groups

Did you know that The United States is the only developed nation that allows prisons to be private, for-profit corporations? That’s weird, huh? The Geo Group is a private prison company that is traded on The NYSE under the ticker symbol GEO. When you have a bunch of people getting billions of our tax dollars to keep people in a cage, it makes you understand why we have a 77% prison recidivism rate. That’s called ‘client retention’ in most companies.

It’s easy to understand why we have so many laws and so many non-violent people sitting in prison when you learn that our tax dollars are paying for a bunch of rich old men to hang out in a country club and count OUR tax money.

If cannabis were legalized, private prison companies would lose billions of dollars.

Law enforcement, including the DEA, would also lose billions with legal cannabis. This is two pronged.

The first financial hit would be reduced funding. Right now, they have a pretty sweet racket. Give us money to fight against a plant that grows in nearly every region of this country. I wish someone would give me tax dollars to eradicate kudzu or poison ivy. I’d be rich. I’d also make sure that I didn’t eradicate it because if I did, they wouldn’t keep blindly throwing money at me.

The second financial hit that law enforcement would take with legal cannabis is lost revenue from fines and losses in cash and property forfeiture. If you get caught with illegal drugs, they police can take your car, cash, and whatever else they determine may have been obtained by ‘dirty’ money. Property is guilty until proven innocent. Where do you think the $30k cash goes when someone gets caught with drugs? I’m sure it’s either destroyed or put back into the city’s operating budget and doesn’t buy the guy who found it a Wave Runner.

I want to be clear that I’m not attacking the police officers on the ground doing the scary and dangerous work. These people risk their lives to keep us safe. The problem is with the law enforcement guys that are politicians, not the real cops. The real cops are cool and put in the middle of a dirty situation by the corrupt politicians.

Big Rehab

This is funny one. I learned about this special interest group several years ago when I ran into SAM or Smart Approaches to Marijuana. Their executive director is this turd named Kevin Sabet. This guy is a total chode. It’s hard to find a smug face more punchable than Sean Payton, but Kevin Sabet has one.

SAM’s ideas sound good at face value. They believe in eliminating criminal penalties for non-violent marijuana offenders. They believe in drug education. However, when you start peeling back the layers, the stink of the onion comes out.

Their solution is mandatory rehab for ‘cannabis violators.’ Guess who owns the rehab facilities. DING DING DING – Their donors! AND If you can’t afford to pay for your rehab, then the tax payer will gladly pay for it. SAM’s version of rehab is simply rebranding prison as ‘rehab’. Recidivism for rehab is about 50%, so you don’t get as many repeat clients as prisons do, but you can still buy a yacht if you own a chain of rehab clinics, so don’t worry about these rich people not being able to afford private school tuition for their kids and grandkids.

A Great Case Study in Hypocrisy and Greed:

I’m not going to mention this person by name because I know his wife and him and I want to show a little respect. This man was a U.S. Senator from Georgia. He was also Chairman of the Health and Human Services committee in 2017. During his time as a U.S. Senator, he blocked marijuana reform every chance he could. As HHS chair, he could have unilaterally rescheduled marijuana to something more appropriate than schedule 1 – the highest and worst drug class. Cocaine and Fentanyl are schedule 2, so if you were an alien and evaluating drugs based upon the Controlled Substances Act, you would deduce that cocaine and fentanyl are safer than cannabis. And you’d be an OD’d alien.

With all of these opportunities to personally help medical cannabis, this man blocked it every chance he got. His explanation was simple. “As a former doctor, I haven’t seen any evidence that cannabis is safe and has medicinal properties. My job is to protect people.”

After he was forced to resign as HHS Chair for misusing tax payer money to fly first class, guess what happened. He had an epiphany and realized that cannabis has medical value. He also got a seat on the board of directors of one of the 6 companies that were given a license to grow and sell cannabis in Georgia. It’s amazing how quickly people can evolve and want to help people. All it takes is a piece of a Billion+ Dollar oligopoly.

Conclusions:

Power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Greed is one of the seven deadly sins. Hypocrites don’t even try to hide their hypocrisy anymore. The most dangerous and most addictive drug is money.

I honestly didn’t know where this blog was going to go when I started writing it. I was planning on a much lighter piece that was going to make jokes about dopey people, but it turns out that I was more inspired to shine light on the bad people than I was to pick one the dumb ones.

After writing this, I’ve come to the conclusion that it isn’t idiots that deny cannabis’ medical value, it’s only a-holes. I’m sure many of these a-holes are also idiots, but idiocy isn’t the reason.

I don’t have a personal problem with people who don’t think cannabis has medicinal value. I have a problem with them being disingenuous as to why they say it doesn’t. I wish they would just be honest and say, “I make a lot of money from the status quo and I like the lifestyle that the money buys me.” This way, we can have an honest debate about what’s going on.

I 100% understand this because I make money with hemp and cannabis being legal and I want to protect my livelihood. Maybe I’m an a-hole, too?

Take care and thanks for reading!

Daniel