How Delta 8 Helped Me When a Tree Fell on My House

This entry into the Loco Ocho Diary was brought to you by Better Than Nine Blueberry Yum Yum Delta 8 Vape and that dickhead tropical depression Fred.

Today, Tuesday August 17, 2021, was one of the most annoying days of the year. It started off with a routine oil change for my truck. There is this tropical storm Fred that has been dumping rain for like 2 days. My mechanic, Takis, always wants my car in at 8am for oil changes so he can get me in and out before the real mechanic work starts. I hate waking up early and his shop is about 30 minutes away, so I had to wake up at 7 am and drive through a hurricane to get there. But, whatever, I’m legally an adult so I have to act like one sometimes.

While I was waiting for my oil change, Takis came in and told me that I needed rear brake pads and rotors and that’s about $380.00. I didn’t feel like spending $400 on that today, but brakes are pretty important, so I said, “The truck’s on the lift. I have a bunch of conference calls I can do from my phone, let’s do it.” So, they started taking my car apart to do the brakes.

About 25 minutes after that, my phone rang with a name I recognized but couldn’t remember which Trevor it was. I answered and it was my next door neighbor.

He asked, “Hey, are you home?”

I said, “No. What’s up?”

He said, “A tree fell on your house and it looks pretty bad. We wanted to make sure yall were okay.”

I was like, “What?!?! What part of the house?”

Because my wife was at home and she hadn’t called me to tell me a tree fell on the house, which is weird because she usually calls me for no reason at all. A tree crashing through the house is something worth mentioning. So, I was terrified that it had fallen on her and she was dead or incapacitated.

Trevor said it fell over the back deck and sent me some pics. That’s not where my wife wouldn’t normally been, but it was still weird that she wasn’t calling or answering her phone. So, I called my parents to go see what was going on. At this point, Takis offered to lend me his car to go home and see what was up, but I said my parents were only 5 min away and I can wait and see if I need to go. OH BTW – I forgot my delta 8 vape at my desk and didn’t have one in the car, so I was dealing with this with no mental help.

Within about 10 minutes, my dad and my wife both called me and said everyone was okay, but there was a leak in the kitchen. My dad called the tree guy to come fix it, but he said it would be tomorrow, so I had to figure out how to stop the water from coming in the house. I pretty handy and know how to use tools and do ‘manly’ things, but I don’t particularly enjoy it, especially under these circumstances.

They finished my car and I got home about 11am. It was still pouring rain with no end in site. My dad was waiting with a tarp and a raincoat for me. I was like, “shiiiiiiiiiit. This is gonna suck.” I went down to my office and sucked a Blueberry Yum Yum Delta 8 Vape like I was gonna get money to come out of it.

It was like when Popeye squeezes the can of spinach so hard that it shoots out and blams him in the mouth. Suddenly, the idea of climbing on the roof and sawing tree branches during a tropical storm went from being the worst idea in the world the to coolest thing I could imagine.

[5:22pm -I stopped writing here and am going to Zaxby’s to eat. I’ll finish the story after I eat]

[6:57pm – I’m back. I ate a wings and things plate. It was terrific]

I ran up that up ladder with my handsaw like a monkey with a banana. I sat up there for 30 minutes in the pouring rain cutting off the branches so I could cover the holes in the roof with a tarp. I’m not conditioned for that type of work anymore, so I even took a five minute break to hit my D8 vape some more. It was actually kinda peaceful and serene sitting on the roof of the house, hidden in tree branches, while ripping a vape pen.

I was done before I even knew it and I barely even remembered that I had to do such an awful chore. I was soaking wet and covered in tree dirt, sawdust, and leaves. I took a shower and then went and got some Zaxby’s and it turned out to be a good day.

Thanks, Delta 8!

By: Daniel Macris

Cannabis expert and ceo of Better Than Nine

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